Journal of the day

How long do you process your feeling?

A few weeks ago my car got hit. I was driving on my way back home from work. It was already dark. I was shocked when another  car hit my car from the back. It was then followed by uncomfortable feelings of sadness and anger inside. I blamed the guy who was driving that car. We were in argument for a few minutes. Then I went home with very uncomfortable feelings. How long do you usually process such feelings? To be honest it took me days or even weeks to process it.

This has become part of ‘me’.

It was my heart that was shocked, not my car. Why shocked? I had been developing the idea of owning that car, and this idea had become so strong. It became part of me. It became an attachment. A mental attachment, not a physical attachment.

This idea of owning that car has occupied my awarness or probably my heart also and it is how it becomes part of ‘me’. So whatever happens to that car, my heart creates the feelings accordingly, based on the awarness. It is like I let my feeling is controlled by what I posess (what I am attached to).

How did I process that uncomfortable feelings? I talked to myself to put my awareness right again. It is false to consider that car to be part of me. It took me a bit of time till everything became fine. That I and the car are different entities. Nothing can become part of me. If you want your car always safe, then don’t drive it. Keep it at home. But a car is meant to transport you for one place to another. It is meant to support you. To make your life easier. It is not meant to be kept in your car port. To get hit by another car is a risk. And you have mitigated the risk by having it insured. That is the way how it is.

Since then I see that car differently. As my transportation facility. Not more than that. I won’t allow any idea of owning it to become part of me. In this way, I set my mental free from being hurt.

7 thoughts on “How long do you process your feeling?

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