Reflection

How to change your mindset

During the weekend, last week I joined a 3-day training. It was a long training. I thanked to my best friend who invited me to join this training.

Almost the whole training was about mindset, how to change the mindset and how deal with false beliefs. I think everyone of us has false belief of some areas of our lives. This false belief is also very often limiting us. It doesn’t liberate us. It sometimes even stops us from pursuing our dream.

We were given a handouts for our exercises. There are 72 common false beliefs in one of the exercises and we have to score ourselves on each one.

This training really taught me how to deal with my false beliefs. Easy to be said than done. It doesn’t mean that after the 3 day training all my false beliefs will fly away out of the window. No. It will never happen like that. It always takes some efforts and some times.

Do you find it easy to change your mindset? Have you ever been successful in this?

So what I have to do next is to really internalize it into me so the 3-day effort is not just forgotten easily and does not give me any impact. There has to be an impact on me, I said to myself. If possible a permanent one. And for this internalization, I have made a 100-day project. I go through and work on the 72 false beliefs. One false belief each day. I reflect and ask myself ‘Do you have this belief? What do you understand about this belief? How much has this belief influenced you? How to put it right? etc.’ I then put it in writing, in my journal book. I am still continuing my project now.

I look forward seeing a completely ‘different me’ in 100 days.

Reflection

Financial Freedom

Financial Freedom. It sounds really cool. The definition of financial freedom is to have a lifestyle that you desire without having to work or rely on anyone else for money. It is so cool, isn’t it?

Your money works hard for you that all your expenses is covered by your passive income. You don’t need to worry about money. You may spend your whole day, whole week doing something you love. You are carefree.

How much money do you need for your financial freedom?

I remembered when I was in my early 30s, I often discussed with a friend on idea of early retirement. My friend kept saying it to me “Are we going to work like this till the rest of our lives? I think we need to have a courage to resign and do what we love.” The idea also sounded really cool.

By the way we did not work for the same company. She was working for a bank at that time. I am not sure what she was doing exactly. She was only in her late 20s. So she is younger than me. To follow the passion is cool. It definitely needs some preparation and calculation.

I didn’t know about financial freedom at that time. You need to make some preparation for your financial freedom. It takes some works, also some disciplines.

Looking back to that time and today with the financial crisis in front us, if I took the decision to retire early, it was going to be the decision I would regret. Taking a really big risk in life without thinking it really deeply.

How much money do you need to have your financial freedom? Eveybody would have a different amount. Freedom is more a feeling, something non-physical. When you have to put a number to something feeling-based, then it will be quite different from one person to another. And there is nothing wrong with any number someone puts. It very much depends on the readiness of the heart in each one.

What sounds cool is not always cool.

Reflection

Don’t get caught up.

It is serious! If you have a problem in your life and it is really a very big problem, I tell you “Dont get caught up in that particular problem!”

And it means you should not only think that one problem day and night, for several days or weeks. No! It is not worth it.

If you are in a relationship with someone, I tell you the same “Don’t get caught up in that one relationship!”

Many people get caught up in their committed relationships.

You might be inspired by one particular person. You might like him or her so much. And it is OK to get inspired, it is good. You then decide to do something in your life, probably to make some changes. That inspiration might become a little push for you. And many times you might need it. But then realize, that’s enough. You have to carry on with your own life. You can not become dependent all the time to whoever give you inspiration or support. Don’t become his or her devotee. I observed this devotion feeling in a comitted relationship¬† and I found it ended up unhealthy for one party or even for both.

Company colors the soul. It is the right expression for this. You probably don’t want to get coloured by one company, you might want to have your own colour. For this, make sure that you are not caught up in one relationship.

If you find yourself caught up in one problem, get something to distract your attention. Get your mind distrancted. Read a book or go for a walk for example. It helps your mind refreshed. It doesn’t mean that you don’t try to solve it, not at all. Sometimes because the problem is so complicated, you can see its root cause really clearly and you can’t see any clear solution. You need to pause yourself for some times.

Your life is not only about one problem or one person you have a relationship with. Make your life as colorful as you want it to be. Make friends with as many people as possible. When you are making friends with them, become one who brings a positive influence. Become one who colors your companies.

Reflection

Living with inspirations

When you need an inspiration, what do you ussually do? Or where do you go?

Do you need an inspiration in your day to day life or not?

Where do you go for an inspuration?

In my case,  I have several targets to achieve that definitely need some fresh inspirations. Firstly I have to give a public talk or workshop to serve community once a month. It is always a free topic. No one gives me a particular topic. This is a monthly target. Secondly  I have to write a weekly post for this blog. Thirdly I have to write at least four journals every morning. These are my personal targets.

The third one is very easy. This is about my daily reflection. It is based on my experience, observation, what I read or what I listen in a class. To achieve this target, I just need to make time in the morning and a solitude. That’s it! Ideas seem to freely flow. I do not experience any pressure doing this because basically I am just expressing what is in my head.

The first and second ones are not always easy. Sometimes I feel stuck. I need some inspirations. Sometimes I need a different atmosphere also.

Today I decided to go out for an inspiration. Today is a weekend. I carried my laptop and books in a tote bag (a shopping bag). When I was just getting ready, my neighbour who was happenly in his garage asked me “Where are you going?” Our houses are just across to each other.  “Just looking for an inspiration.” I replied, leaving him with a smile. He knows me and understands what I meant with that answer.

I went to the nearest Starbucks Coffee. Starbucks ussually does not fail for this purpose. When I got there, I saw some people were busy with their laptops. This coffee shop is located in separated building, sharing space with a marketing gallery for property. It is suitable for a working space during weekend. I spent three hours there. I found it was a quite productive weekend!

Happy weekend everyone!

Reflection

Being faithful

If you love someone or something, you might become faithful to whom or what you love. To be faithful to someone means not to have somebody else in your heart. You are not thinking of someone else. You may share your life (time) with her or him. Then it is called to be faithful.

What about if you love something? You will use it, take care of it as frequently as possible, because you love it. You won’t keep it safe at home and not use it. To love something is to appreciate its best function and it is to utilize it as it is meant to be. It can be your bag, shoes, coat, watch, tumbler, pen or any other stuff that you use it everyday.

When you really love something, it is amazing that you won’t develop any feeling of boredom in using that stuff everyday.

I know one kid who loved his t-shirt with picture of a train on the front side of the t-shirt. He would only want to wear that t-shirt. Anyway that train was called Thomas in Thomas and Friends. It was a character on the cartoon movie he watched on TV. It sounds very funny. I was not sure what was in his mind about this character, which was a train, not an animal or a human being. Well kids have unlimited imagination sometimes.

I am not sure what was in his mind having this Thomas everyday.

I have my favourite Starbucks tumbler for my drink. I also use it everyday. It is designed for a hot and also cold drink. So, for me having just one tumbler is enough. I would always carry this tumbler to the office. I would feel something is missing when I forget to bring it. The reason is because I love it.

A colleague loves collecting tumblers. She has more than a dozen of tumblers in her collection. They are all Starbucks tumblers. Merchandise of starbucks. Every season they have new merchandise for sale. And my colleague would always buy one when she likes its design.

She loves those tumblers. She doesn’t use same tumbler all the time. Her love is for all the collections. Her love is devided. Although she has many, but she will only use one at one time. For her, to love is to keep it.

Jokingly I said to her “I think I am more faithful to one.”

Another colleague bought a special tumbler of BTS when they launched it as a merchandise. Probably a limited edition. She bought it and  kept it and never used it.

I just don’t understand why adults do not learn to love like a kid.

Reflection

Three aspects of time

The three aspects of time – past, present and future.

This concept only applies in this physical world. It is only experienced when we are in our physical bodies. To say this, it means that we are not this bodies. We are the one who use this body, who entered this body. We are like a guest yo this body. There is a time when we come and a time when we go.

The 3 aspects of time merge into ‘now’.

We came to this physical world from the home of souls. We are souls. We are from the world beyond, it is called the soul world. In the soul world there is no three aspects of time. The three merge into one. There is no past, present nor future.

Your consciouness is not trapped in any of this aspect of time. It happens only when you are soul conscious. If you remain body conscious, you will remain trapped by one thing or another that is limited. You keep being pulled. Your attention is pulled. Your mind is pulled. Your awareness is pulled. Pulled and trapped.

Is it possible to becone free from this? Yes, it is possible. Develop soul consciouaness.

Do you like being pulled or being free?

Reflection

Number doesn’t lie

How much do you really care of your spending? Or how well do you manage your money?

One of the aspects in money management is how to manage your spending. Are you a good spender?

After a meeting with a long time friend who had been so long not seeing each other for the last couple of years, I had a thought to make a proper analysis on my spending. I have recorded almost all my spendings for the last few years. I never thought that I could have become so discipline in keeping this for this long. I made the record manually. Every single receipt of any payment was recorded on a book. I have made a quick analysis on monthly basis. I knew whether the total expense was increasing or not, how much I spent on month-to-month basis. I didn’t make any proper analysis. No wonder that my expense was increasing for the last few months.

I decided to put all the records into a worksheet in my laptop. I am using Microsoft Excel for this. It makes everything so easier. In any data analysis, the more datas and the more detailed and accurate, the better. It will then speak something. It tells you everything accurately and honestly. Number doesn’t lie.

An accurate graph will speak the truth.

It says…

One. My year-to-date expense on Starbucks in 2022 increased more than 300% than it was in 2021.

Two. I have spent on Starbucks almost as much as on gasoline.

Three. A cup of hot chocolate is much more expensive than a litre of gasoline.

With this simple analysis, I know what I need to do or change in my spending. Gasoline is more essential than hot chocolate drink. Moreover the price of gasoline has just increased. I have to become more mindful on spending on what is less essential.

It also tells me the accurate number on groceries, house maintenance, meals, communication, insurance, fashion, leisure etc.

You will become more confident when you have to make any financial decision. You will also become more committed to what you are going to do with your money when you have this data-based analysis with you.

When I shared my charts and tables of this analysis to a colleague who is working in Finance Division, she said that she was amazed that I could make it so consistent. She tried to make same record of her spending, but then she did not like the feeling like being suffocated every time she was going to make one. Then she did not continue doing it. Actually I heard this from some other colleagues too.

I think the hardest part is to make something into a routine, then into a habit. To start something is easy. To continue doing it is always not easy. It really takes a commitment.

Reflection

The sign of spiritual awakening


It is very interesting. Someone who is spirititually awaken will love solitude. They are comfortable of being with themselves. They enjoy their own company. They enjoy being alone. They don’t experience loneliness. In fact they experience their hearts to be full. They experience spiritual ‘excitement’.

Why?

It is the spirit that is awaken. The spirit is hidden inside. Very subtle. The spirit is the life. When the spirit is awaken, the life inside is back from a long deep sleep. An awaken spirit knows what is true and real.

The spirit is busy seeking the true peace, true happiness and true love. There is excitement in this internal seeking. The spirit understands how to get that feelings. It is not from the external. Not from people nor external entertainment. They know the journey to truth is an internal journey, the journey to the true self.

The more you enjoy being with the company of your own self, the more the spirit is awaken. There are more other signs of being spiritually awaken, but I think this is the main one.

Do you experience this sign in you?

Reflection

Temporary Beauty vs. Permanent Beauty

You might agree with me that cosmetic does an amazing thing, if not called a magic. It can change somebody’s appearance dramatically. Someone may look so beautiful having a make-up. Though someone may look so pretty with a make-up, she doesn’t want to have it for the whole time. When she arrives home or when she is going to bed, she will definitely clean her face from the cosmetic product she has applied on her face. A make-up remover is applied.

A friend asked me to buy a cosmetic product for her. It was a pencil for eyebrow. Dark brown colored. She also mentioned the brand in her message. I read her message very quickly and I replied OK.

I went to the nearest store, not a big store to get the stuff. I was so sure without asking the sales counter, I went to the cosmetic section. I knew what I wanted to buy. I looked at the whole section where different brands of cosmetic products displayed but I couldn’t find the pencil I wanted. Then I told the sales counter about it. She asked me the brand I was looking for. I said with so much confidence: “Vivo.”

She looked a bit confused and said: “There is no such brand for cosmetics. We have Viva, not Vivo.”

I became confused and to make sure I checked what my friend had written to me. It said Viva. Later I remembered that Vivo is a brand for electronic products.

Inner beauty is beauty from the heart.

You might also agree with me that make-up can only give a temporary beauty not a permanent one, an external beauty. While inner beauty is from the heart. You don’t need to apply any make-up to have inner beauty. What you need is a kind, gentle, strong and big heart. You can have it for the whole time. You don’t need any remover for this.

Reflection

Boredom

I like putting ideas in my head in writing. If someone asks me why, my answer would be in the sake of clarity. Yes, when it is put in writing, it becomes clear to me. I like writing everything, an idea or an issue that is occupying my head.

If it is an idea, it allows me to see how much I have understood. If it is an issue or a problem, it allows me to see the root cause of it and what possible solution or probably just a way to deal with it.

Long time ago a friend asked me if I have written a topic on boredom. I think she was feeling bored at that time. Another time she said to me that she was feeling overwhelmed. I then tried to recall if I had written one. I didn’t remember. I think I never write about this topic. It doesn’t mean that I never feel bored. Sometimes I also feel it, but it never becomes an issue that I have to really pay attention and seek a remedy.

I like to put myself as a learner. I see life around me and also nature as an opportunity to learn something. There is always something new that I can explore. The world around us is like a very big school and all of us are students. There is always enthusiasm in being a student. You will always find it as a life long learning process.

The exam would not be fixed in timing. The question would be different for each one. We can not copy it from other students. The good thing in this process is that we are still allowed to fail. We are given a chance to learn again.

How do you deal with boredom?