When I got covid-19 and just got tested, it said that my CT level was only 14. It was very low. The lowest among anyone I knew who got covid-19. I was introduced to start knowing some numbers. The body temperature, the pulse rate and also the oxygen saturation. All is indicated in numbers. I had an oxymeter to check the oxygen saturation and pulse with me. I heard from people the oxygen saturation tends to drop in covid patients. and when it drops to 90 or 85, one needs oxygen. The virus infects the lungs and quickly affect the respiratory system. Most of the covid patients experience shortness of breath, including me.
It should be checked regularly to know whether the patient need oxygen or not. Every time I checked my oxygen saturation that little monitor showed numbers, it kept changing from 99, 98, 97, 97,95, then 94. It takes a little bit of time to finally stop and show a number of oxygen saturation level. If you are the patient, that few seconds can make so panicked and restless. It was said that you need to be cautious if it goes down below 95. In such a situation, I decided not to check it again. I just didn’t want to know it anymore. Much later a friend who shared her story to me, taking care of four people in her family who got covid at the same time said that she became very stressful hearing the word oxygen saturation. The four people had to be hospitalized and all needed oxygen. The sad story was that one of them died, her brother in law.
The only thing that I kept with me is a thermometer. It was to check my body temperature. I needed to know if I still needed to take paracetamol or not. Covid-19 might not a simple disease. But I didn’t want to get myself complicated with those numbers and get stressed and worried. Worries would never help me. So I chose not to be worried.
When I had to stay in my self quarantine due to Covid-19 recently, as soon as I experienced something was not right with my body, I decided to disconnect myself from the world. And what it means to me is that I didn’t follow the news of what was happening out there. I did not allow it to enter my mind. I made my mind completely free from anything from external. I didn’t read any news nor watch any news. I kept telling myself that it was not the time to read or search for more information. The only information I needed at that time was how to deal with Covid-19. And I thought I was having enough of it with me. So I made myself focused on what was essential for me to do.
If something happened in the world and it was related to me or I had a responsibility in it, then I would surely know it very soon without me following the news of it. But if I didn’t know it or someone didn’t tell me, then I was so sure that it might not be related to me or I didn’t have any responsibility in it.
To be honest I was disconnected myself from ‘the world’ for a month. And I experienced my mind to be very clear through having very less thoughts. I listened to a class on zoom in the morning, it was my meditation class. So practically during the day I only had the thoughts of what taught in the morning class, which were positive and empowering ones.
What happened then with my mind? My mind became very clear in processing each thought. The decision I made was accurate. Practically I had no waste thoughts in my mind. When the number of thoughts is less, then they will become powerful and very clear. There is no clarity and thoughts are not powerful when you allow many thoughts occupy your mind.
So the practice of being disconnected from the world for a period of time is really really essential. I wish I can have this opportunity to do this again in the future, but of course without Covid-19. It is really a good practice for the mind and also for the heart. It empowers the soul.
My mission after having recovered from Covid-19 was to inspire many people to be fearless in dealing with Covid-19 in particular and in facing their life in general. Through several events onlines I have done this. It is accomplished somehow. Through ‘30 Minutes Celebration, free from covid’ I shared basically to my friends and colleagues only, still not many people. So I still need to continue this mission, to reach more people. And of course through sharing in this blog too.
When I shared this to a friend, he said ‘the next mission will be not to get reinfected’. I think he is right. absolutely right. Because we will never be completely free from Covid-19. I have got recovered at the moment, but it doesn’t guarantee that I will be free from the virus forever. This virus will stay with us, around us and close to us forever. There will be a new strain and another new strain and another one. They will keep coming, because that is also the way they survive on this planet. They also have right for their survival. There will be no other choice for us, except to be ready, to keep protecting ourselves and staying safe.
I remember I had a thought of having a celebration when I got recovered. I call it ‘30 Minutes Celebration, free from Covid-19’. I shared this idea to a friend. In fact my body was so weak at that time. My friend might think that I had been feeling better. He said ‘It is a great idea. When you keep light and positive about it, it will inspire people.’ Actually I was not even going through my lowest point, my body was too weak and I still got high fever. Yet my mind was busy thinking and planning on the idea – the format of the celebration, what I wanted to share or say, who would be invited etc. Thinking of the celebration is having a positive thought. A positive thought gives power to the soul. This thought has made me focus on the recovery and not on the sickness. It must have contributed to my speedy recovery.
Since then I have a mission to encourage people to stay calm and stay courageous in dealing covid-19. Last Sunday I had my celebration on ZOOM. I invited my bosses, colleagues and friends for this. I was very happy that they could make it. I shared my experience in dealing with Covid-19 fearlessly, how I stayed happy and courageous. To my bosses, colleagues and friends, thank you for making time to join my celebration. You have supported me through your good wishes. I am so grateful to have you all.
When a colleague was being hospitalized due to Covid-19 in December last year, he told me that he didn’t like the meals provided by the hospital. I posted his story on A Solo Battle. So he decided to get his meals from outside through online order.
When I was in my self-quarantine at home, I didn’t have choices what to have for my meals. I only had in my stock one big package of oats, a box of raisin and a box of milk. I was not favourite for having breakfast with oats and raisin actually. But that was the only menu that I could have for breakfast. It is very easy and very quick to prapare. Only 3 minutes! My body was too weak to prepare my own meal longer than 3 minutes. So I had oats and raisin for my breakfast every single day. Since then I love this breakfast.
I had vegie soup for my lunch. I call it three-colors soup. Sweet corn, spinach and carrot. It looks fresh and super nice. I also had this menu every sibgle day. When I shared my soup photo to my colleague (I mention above) with a caption ‘I am very grateful with this soup’. He quickly responded ‘It must taste so good’. In fact I only put salt and pepper in it. It is just similar with hospital’s meal. It’s quite plain, not spicy at all.
The covid patients are always adviced to have sun rays, so I also did it. I sat just right in front of my front door to get the morning rays from the sun. It was really cool having my favourite drink, honey lemon tea. It is the hot one. It was just my mood booster.
I was really grateful with my simple meals during my self-quarantine.
When you are grateful, your heart is happy because you love what you have and you are not craving for something you don’t have.
When people get covid-19, they tend to be worried or panicked. In my case, I tried my best to stay calm. I understand the more I get worried, the worse my situation will become. And I will not be able to make a clear decision of what I need to do. So I choose to stay calm.
The question is then ‘How?’ I stopped reading and following the news of what was happening in the world, around me or the world out there. I didn’t want to know the news about covid-19 either. I thought if something happened in the world out there and I needed to know or it was related to me, then I would know it soon. But if I didn’t know it, it might not be related to me.
I stopped using almost all the social medias. Yes I still used my WhatsApps during that period, but only to communicate with some people whom I needed especially in dealing with Covid-19, or who needed me for a support or encouragement especially knowing some of my friends were also positive covid-19. We were then supporting one another. I don’t watch TV, since I don’t have one now.
In this way I could manage my mind to have very less thoughts. I only allowed positive and encouraging thoughts for myself and for others. And the thoughts were so powerful. The less thoughts you have, the more powerful they become.
Yesterday a friend who lives in Japan was telling me about the opening ceremony of the Tokyo Olympics. He said ‘Tokyo Olympics will be starting soon. Do you watch it?’ I smiled. I felt like I was reminded to the world sport event that is right now happening in Tokyo. So many people must have been waiting for this event.
It has always been very CLEAR with me that this virus only infects the body, not the soul. The soul remains safe and courageous. I kept telling myself and everyone ‘I know this soul is very strong.’
I think this thought helped me a lot in dealing with the virus. My friend said that this is the power of thought.
I took the medicine and vitamins that prescribed by a doctor. I had my covid vaccine. I heard from many people that after having vaccinated someone may still get infected but with mild symptoms, like me. This also helped me in my recovery.
I could maintain a state of having no complaint, about my situation nor the virus. I always communicated to the virus with love ‘Virus, you may stay here but I need to make this body strong. You will be more comfortable when this body is strong.’ In this way, I only allowed love fill my heart, including love for the virus. When there is love, there is no fear. In this way I remained fearless.
Actually people are not afraid of covid-19 but death. Because rarely people have prepared for their death.
I have one mission now, to inspire as many people as possible not to be afraid of covid-19 and stay courageous.
I think everyone agrees that suffering in this world is increasing day by day. In all levels – physical, emotional and mental levels. This pandemic has made the suffering even more and more real in front of us. Natural calamities – flood, fire, storms and earthquakes have also contributed to the suffering in the world. The five elements of nature have shown their fearsome faces. Conflict and wars are no less. There is no peace in the world nowadays.
If God is almighty, He can do everything He needs to do to stop this suffering in the world right now, our logic say. Why does God not finish all this suffering in the world with His mights? It is not a big thing for God to finish all of these. Why does He not do it? A friend asked me this question not long ago. We were in a discussion on this topic. It was an open discussion between two friends. Just two of us. Topic on God was not sensitive to be discussed for both of us. I said to him ‘I think God is not emotional nor sentimental like us.’
We need to understand God’s role and also His timing. God loves everyone, God can’t bear seeing anyone suffering. It is no doubt! God doesn’t stop the suffering, but He provides strength for us to take from Him so we can go through all of these situations and suffering more easily. All of these have to happen. What is meant to happen will happen and God will not interfere. He provides the strength we need. This is His role in this world, to help us. So take that strength from Him. Take the help from Him. Draw that strength into your soul and make yourself so powerful inside.
This pandemic has changed almost every aspect of our life. If you are working in an office, you might notice some changes made to adapt to the situation. Everbody has adopted a new norm.
In my office, we are not allowed to have our breakfast or lunch in the pantry. This is to practice a physical distancing. The pantry is designed like a cafe, so we used to enjoy being there. It had become a place for socializing among colleagues. Some also enjoyed having a meeting there, more casual. We also have to bring our own utensils. Some colleagues start bringing their lunch boxes from home. It is considered to be safer than having it from the nearest restaurant or food court nowadays. And I also noticed some consider having lunch in their cars. is a choice while the pantry is closed.
In fact I have been doing both since long before the pandemic – bring my lunch and have it in my car. The reason is that I am a vegetarian, it is not easy to find vegetarian menu from the nearest food court. Secondly I don’t like carrying my lunch box up while carrying a shoulder bag and my laptop. It is more simple to leave my much box in the car and have it there at lunch time.
The other thing that has changed in my office is the after office activity. We used to practice playing table tennis after office hour. We used to enjoy it so much. We have an inspiration room and in one end of the room, we have our table tennis. We also had league for this as well. It was really fun. It was so good for releasing stress. And it has been closed since the pandemic began. We miss this a lot.