You might have heard an advice not to see the defect but see the speciality of everyone. To see mean to observe or to put your attention and energy to the object of your observation. Attention is the energy of the mind. Energy in us is limited. So we have to be careful in using it. Don’t waste the energy. Use it in a worth while way. To see the defect in others is to drain the energy. Usually after seeing, then followed by thinking and talking and reacting. In the form of thought, words and then action. In this three forms we are using our energy.
Very recently I was in a short course on productivity. It covered how to become productive with our time, attention, decision and energy. The facilitator was delivering the topic really well. For me to be a good facilitator is when he or she enables the participants to understand the topic being delivered easily. To make something complicated easier to be understood. Something theoritical practical. After the session I came up to him to give him a compliment. I said “You are such a passionate trainer.” This words are words of appreciation. When you give a compliment from your heart in fact you are giving very positive energy. Make it a habit. See the goodness in others and let them know. This will empower others. You never know how much your words will impact on that person positively. Always believe that whatever you are doing good will come back to you. Keep doing it to everyone around you. Keep empowering.
Why is it important to have faith in life? How to develop faith in life?
Life is what happens. Whatever happens, big or small, it happens to you or someone else, it has happened or it is still going to happen, all is called life. How do you see life of the past and how do you see life of the future? Do you always see it as a good one? Or do you sometimes think that it is unfair or that it should not happen the way it happened? How do you see the future? Does it always look bright? Or does sometimes worry creep into your heart that you are not so sure?
I remember an advice from one of my dear friends who kept saying to me ‘Everything is good’. Whatever happened was good, what is happening is good and what is going to happen will be good. Don’t carry any regret of the past. It passed. No need to think ‘why did it happen that way? It shouldn’t have happened etc etc’. This is how we usually develop regret. It belongs to the past. Leave it in the past. Don’t create fear of the future. Trust that life in the future will be good.
Whatever happens is what is meant to happen. There is no mistake in life. There is nothing to regret nor to be worried about. If you keep saying this to yourself or you keep reminding this to your self everyday, what would happen? You are developing faith in life. You will see everything with your new understanding. You will then accept everything that happen very easily. You will easily forgive and accept.
Have a wonderful weekend!
We need to develop faith in the self, in God and in life. Which one is easier for you? It is very interesting that someone shared to me that developing faith in God is a lot easier than developing faith in the self and in life. I also remember that in my life I was introduced to have faith in God much earlier than the other two. So, I found it also easier to develop faith in God. But then I thought to have faith in the self should be the first job to be done. Know yourself first and you will find a lot easier to know the rest. To know the self is to understand who you are. It is only when you understand who you really are, you are able to develop faith in the self. Complete this internal work first.
Everything starts from the self. Any change also starts from the self. You can not change others, unless you are able to change yourself. You can not influence others unless you can influence yourself. You can not see the goodness in others, unles you can see it in you. You can not convince others unless you can convince the one you see in the mirror everyday. The way one sees the self and treats the self determines the way he sees and treats others. Everything is a reflection from within.
To have faith in the self means to realize one’s self-worth. You are here for a bigger purpose. You have something to contribute to the world. You have the capacity to make a change or make a difference. Remind yourself everyday.
We need to have faith in leading our daily life. Faith is not given. We need to develop and nurture faith. Faith has something to do with the intellect. Intellect is one of the faculty in the soul, the other faculties are mind and heart. Soul is subtle and spiritual. It is inside our heads. So developing and nurturing faith is another internal work that each one of us need to do.
Faith brings clarity in the intellect. Intellect is called the eye of the soul. It can see what is right and wrong very clearly. Faith makes you free from having doubt and confusion. A faithful intellect develops decision power. A decision can be made very quickly and accurately. When a decision is accurate, you are free from regret. You also have the power to execute the decision.
There are three kinds of faith that you might need to develop – faith in the self, faith in God and faith in life. Make time and do something to nurture your faith inside daily. It is said that faith leads to success in everything you do.
When I conduct a journaling workshop, I always encourage the participants to practice writing right away. I usually ask them to remember one particular situation that happened recently that created a very strong feeling. When the feeling is strong enough then it is very easy to start writing it out. It could be positive feeling or negative feeling.
Most of the people find it a lot easier to write the negative one and it is okay. A participant expressed disagreement to me when it came to write a negative feeling. She said that by remembering a negative feeling and writing it, the feeling would become even stronger. Then it is against the purpose of journaling. Because the purpose of journaling is in fact to finish the negative feelings and empower the self.
How can journaling finish the negative feeling and empower the self? When you are writing a journal, you need to sit on the seat of the ‘real I’. You are listening to the ‘false I’, either the ‘depressed I’ or ‘the arrogant I’. This ‘false I’ is in fact the ego. The ego is false. It is the ego that creates the negative feeling. Let the ’false I’ speak about the situation and feeling clearly and honestly and let ‘the real I’ listen. She is a good listener. She is very patient, mature and wise. She always listens very carefully. When the ‘false I’ finishes speaking, let the ‘real I’ speak or share some wisdom to your situation. Let her empower you.
You are not the feeling. You are the creator of the feeling. The feeling is your creation, but your creation is not you. You will become very clear about this. You are distanced from your feeling. You are detached from your feeling. Because you are detached from the feeling, so you can observe the creation better. You can write it in a detached way.
When you write your journal in this detached way, as if you are an observer of what is happening inside you, the feeling will become weaker and the ‘real I’ become stronger. Become a detached observer. It is said that emotion dies under observation.
In every workshop on journaling, I always encourage people to start writing with an honest heart. Open the heart and start writing the feelings out, because this is how the heart will get healed. Be honest with the self by writing the feeling out.
Some people find it so hard to do it. They said that they have fear that others might read their journal, that other might know their feelings. Is it really harmful if others know what you feel? Fear is definitely unhealthy. It doesn’t make the soul free. Someone shared that when she was a teenager, someone read her diary and told everyone about what she wrote in the diary. This made her really ashamed and since then she stopped writing it.
For me, journaling is the best way to deal with any negative feeling and finish it quickly. I agree that some emotions might be so strong and it takes more time to finish. You might need to journal it several times. But it will definitely become weaker and weaker if you keep journaling it. Finally it will finish completely. When it finishes, you don’t feel it anymore. You still remember the situation, but the feeling is no longer there. Then if others know what you felt, it will be okay with you. I remembered I shared my journal with a friend. I read it for her. She knew what I was writing about. She knew my situation, what I felt and also how I was dealing with that. We laughed together.
This journaling is primarily for the self, not for anyone else. In fact this is a good practice to know the self better, and understand the self better. It is a practice to develop self-awareness. In the long run, it will build a healthy relationship with the self. When you have a good relationship with the self, you will find it very easy to relate to anyone. It is just not possible to have a good relationship with others when the relationship with the self is not healthy.
It is said that knowledge is power. You might have heard this many times. But how do you experience this practically in your life? You might have read so many books with great advice to become a better person. You might have attended seminars, trainings and workshops and that you felt so inspired. You were inspired to make a change. You really wanted to make a change in you. But, do you experience that a change is easy? Is it to change yourself easy? I think a change is difficult. You might reflect on yourself after sometimes and ask yourself “have I changed? how much have I changed?” You might not see so much change in you. You wished to become a much better you, but it didn’t happen the way you wished to happen. Then, knowledge is not power yet. It doesn’t have power to change you.
Knowledge will become power when you use it to really make a change in you. To change means to change the mindset. To know is the first step and to change the mindset is the next step. Only when your mindset is changed by your new understanding, then you can say knowledge is power.