When people get covid-19, they tend to be worried or panicked. In my case, I tried my best to stay calm. I understand the more I get worried, the worse my situation will become. And I will not be able to make a clear decision of what I need to do. So I choose to stay calm.
The question is then ‘How?’ I stopped reading and following the news of what was happening in the world, around me or the world out there. I didn’t want to know the news about covid-19 either. I thought if something happened in the world out there and I needed to know or it was related to me, then I would know it soon. But if I didn’t know it, it might not be related to me.
I stopped using almost all the social medias. Yes I still used my WhatsApps during that period, but only to communicate with some people whom I needed especially in dealing with Covid-19, or who needed me for a support or encouragement especially knowing some of my friends were also positive covid-19. We were then supporting one another. I don’t watch TV, since I don’t have one now.
In this way I could manage my mind to have very less thoughts. I only allowed positive and encouraging thoughts for myself and for others. And the thoughts were so powerful. The less thoughts you have, the more powerful they become.
Yesterday a friend who lives in Japan was telling me about the opening ceremony of the Tokyo Olympics. He said ‘Tokyo Olympics will be starting soon. Do you watch it?’ I smiled. I felt like I was reminded to the world sport event that is right now happening in Tokyo. So many people must have been waiting for this event.
I think everyone agrees that suffering in this world is increasing day by day. In all levels – physical, emotional and mental levels. This pandemic has made the suffering even more and more real in front of us. Natural calamities – flood, fire, storms and earthquakes have also contributed to the suffering in the world. The five elements of nature have shown their fearsome faces. Conflict and wars are no less. There is no peace in the world nowadays.
If God is almighty, He can do everything He needs to do to stop this suffering in the world right now, our logic say. Why does God not finish all this suffering in the world with His mights? It is not a big thing for God to finish all of these. Why does He not do it? A friend asked me this question not long ago. We were in a discussion on this topic. It was an open discussion between two friends. Just two of us. Topic on God was not sensitive to be discussed for both of us. I said to him ‘I think God is not emotional nor sentimental like us.’
We need to understand God’s role and also His timing. God loves everyone, God can’t bear seeing anyone suffering. It is no doubt! God doesn’t stop the suffering, but He provides strength for us to take from Him so we can go through all of these situations and suffering more easily. All of these have to happen. What is meant to happen will happen and God will not interfere. He provides the strength we need. This is His role in this world, to help us. So take that strength from Him. Take the help from Him. Draw that strength into your soul and make yourself so powerful inside.
Anger is not a basic emotion. Anger is often a reaction to a pain. It can be a physical pain, like tiredness, hunger, thirst or other pain of the body or mental pain like sadness, insecurities, feeling hurt, feeling unworthy etc. Any of these pain may trigger an anger.
I always avoid scheduling a meeting close to lunch time. I remember when I was mentoring some mentees for a management training program, and they were scheduling for their final project presentation, I always suggested either early in the morning or after lunch time. It was a presentation in front of managers as the panelists. When people are hungry, they tend to become a slightly short-tempered, make wrong judgement or make inaccurate decision.
Anger is an emotion, so it should be managed. Anger that is not managed may become so distructive. E-motion is an energy in motion, it should be expressed not suppressed. To express an anger is to release it and to finish it. It doesn’t mean that if you are angry with someone and you will need to shout at her or him or speak with a high-toned voice. No! It is a destructive way. Someone said when you do that, it will hurt that person and he or she will remember or probably carry that hurt for another six months. It is not to finish the anger then.
What is the way to release this emotion that is not desctructive? It is advised to move away from the situation for a little while. If you stay there, you will tend to react unnecessarily like shouting, blaming, complaining or criticizing. You might not be able to control your words. Ussually you will end it up with regret. It creates another emotion. When you physically move away, your mental focus is switched. It allows yourself to take a mental break. It will become effective to avoid you from reacting. Any emotion is temporary, so you need to deal with it so well in that short period of time. You will surely calm down soon. Just make sure not to react when the temper is rising.
Someone used to say this to me. Company colors the soul. You are colored by the company you keep – your spouse, your family members, your friends, your colleagues etc. Those whom you work with or spend time with. You may get colored or you may color them. It depends o how strong your color (influence) in the companionship.
Now look at people around you. What do you talk when you are with them most of the time? There are three things – stuff or event, ideas or other people.
Some people like talking about stuff, a branded bag they just purchased, the latest gadget, the band new car, some are talking about the game they are playing. Average people talk about stuff or event. And some are talking about other people. They are called small people. What other people are doing or not doing, have or not have are completely their own business. These type of people mind other people’s business. This is the type of people you should avoid to be around.
It is said great people talk about ideas. They use their creative mind. Happiness lies in this. Contentment starts here. Not in stuff nor in a game. Happiness created through buying a brand new suff is just temporary. How long do you experience the happiness after you bought your new car?
If you want to become great, surround yourself with people who talk about visions and ideas. Not people. Not stuff nor event. Select the company you want to keep.
I just finished reading a post by a blogger. He wrote his air trip recently. It was his first air trip during the pandemic, after literally one year. He wrote in his post that he made 75 flights in 90 days only before the pandemic. Reading his post, it reminded me of my last air trip. It was in December 2019. I never thought that it would have been this long not to make any trip. A friend who regularly had a vacation at least twice a year also said to me that she has not made any traveling.
What do you miss with a flight? and what do you do when you miss flying? Usually I love every part of a traveling, especially of my vacation. From making a list of what I need to bring for the traveling, packing stuff, heading to the airport, waiting for the boarding, the flight, reaching the destination till making my way back home. I enjoyed each and every part of it. I remember something ridiculous I made on my way back home after a year end trip. I just didn’t want to finish the joy of that trip too soon, that I decided to sit in a coffee shop at the airport from 10 am till 4 pm.
So I miss everything of a traveling. Another ridiculous thing I made when I missed traveling was having apple juice. I ussually put it in a fridge before I enjoy drinking it. I never bought packed apple juice before, I always prefer having fresh juice than having this packed juice. Why did I do this? This was the drink I usually had when I was on a flight.
The flight attendant said ‘We have apple juice, orange juice and guava juice. What do you want to have, madam?’ And I always said ‘Apple juice, please.’
I remember I was meeting with a friend. We were sitting in a coffee shop. It happened before the pandemic. Both of us are interested in journaling. We were sharing about how we were doing our journaling. When I was talking suddenly she stopped me and said to me “Tini, I think you have a very good energy.” I realize that whenever I am talking about journaling, I always speak with a great interest. Because I am so passionate about it. When there is passion, there is love, happiness and enthusiasm. This generates energy. People can feel this energy.
Each one of us vibrates energy to the atmosphere every moment, whether we are speaking or not. Each one of us contributes to the atmosphere. Thought is energy. Our mind never stops generating thoughts. Our being (consciousness) is constantly generating this energy to the atmosphere. This vibration creates frequency. The higher the consciousness, the higher the frequency that is created. What thoughts have high frequency? Thought of peace, happiness, love etc. What thoughts have low vibration? Thought of regret, guilt, anger, blame, fear, shame etc.
What thoughts and vibrations are created around the world collectively for the past one year? probably of worries, of uncertainties, of fear. The world now needs high vibration. Vibe so high!
I think everyone of us has a moment in life when we are down. We feel ourselves in a low state (mental state). You don’t want to let yourself in that low state forever, do you?
What do you do when you are down? How can you make yourself up again? How will you give yourself an encouragment or an energy booster? You can not always find someone to cheer you up, to uplift you. In that situation, you need to find a way to bring your state high.
Make time for yourself and being with yourself. Listen to your heart. Understand the thoughts you keep in your mind that make you feel what you are feeling (feeling low). Then speak to yourself genuinely. Encourage yourself. This is also called a self-affirmation. We need to do this.
Then a friend said “Is it not like sabotaging yourself by telling you are good when in fact you know you are not good?”
If you are now feeling low, check your thoughts. What kind of thoughts have you been keeping in your mind? Be honest in this. This is an internal check. Only you can do it. No one else can do it for you or help you. Not your spouse nor your “soul mate”. This is an individual inner work. To do an honest checking means you need to make time just to be with yourself. Can you do this?
If you are honest enough, you might realize that these are the noise that keep playing in your head. “You are not good enough. “You are weak.” “You are unlovable.” “No one likes you.” These thoughts have sabotaged you and made you BELIEVE it. You feel what you believe. That low state doesn’t come suddenly. It takes time.
Now do the same. Keep telling yourself that you are good enough. You are worthed. You are lovable. You are special. Make yourself believe what you are telling to yourself. I know it also takes time. But if you understand that this is the way to bring yourself up again, will you not do this?
Only see the good side of everything to stay positive. Can you see the good side of everything? This is not using your physical eye, but your spiritual eye. This is the eye of the soul. How do you see situation or problem in your life? You use this eye, don’t you? Even if someone is physically blind, his eye of the soul is not blind, it is widely open. You see everything around you, everything in life with this eye, don’t you? To see the good side of everything means to see it through a wisdom.
You might have heard a very good advice or an elevating quote that touched your heart. Use it in your practical life. To use it means to put it right in front of your eye so you see the situation or the problem through it. You are not directly exposed to the situation or the problem. That wisdom will become like a breaker for you. It saves you from reacting unnecessarily. It saves you from regret or anger. It brings calmness and patience inside, and these are the strength of the soul. Someone with patience is a strong one.
Be happy not because everything is good, but because you can see the good side of everything.
Everyone wants to become creative. To become creative means to keep creating an idea and executing the idea. To be creative you need to have an open mind, a mind that is open to new ideas. Not a closed mind. An open mind is more accepting. An open mind finishes worries and fears inside. It is liberating. It is courageous. Life keeps changing and you need to cope with the change, unless you will be left behind. Life keeps moving, you need to move with it. Life keeps flowing, you need to go with its flow. Life is never static. You need the power to adapt yourself for this. This is a power that you need to develop from within.
How do you make yourself stay open-minded and creative? I think you need to make friend with the younger generations. Talk to them more. Listen to them more. They are very creative. They will bring newness into your creative process inside your head. Many are fast learners, especially in digital technology. You need to be humble in front of them. Learn from them. Keep this spirit of a learner inside you, this spirit will keep seeking and creating new things.
I have a very good friend who is an expert in computer, she is in fact a web designer. This weekend I have an online workshop. I have to prepare a presentation for this workshop. I realize that I am not very good at digital stuff, like downloading video, converting the file and sharing it on a presentation. I knew whom to ask. So I begged her time for a meet up. She is a really kind-hearted person. She taught me everything I needed to know from her. She is not only very good at computer but she is also very good at teaching. Very patient.